A comforting lie can't last

I'm on a bit of self improvement binge as of late, trying to rid my life of some of the negativity I have been experiencing and generally trying to make the world a more pleasant place. And that's why I've decided that it's time for me to stop my double life of sorts I've been living.

Those of you who know me fairly well know that in addition to being ignored, being lied to is one of the things that I find most hurtful and rude. I've also never been a fan of people who put on a facade, whether it be to seem like they're a good person but behind the scenes they're not or just to make someone like them. Well, I realize I've been doing these last two and it's time that it stops. Maybe this lie, the second face I've been putting on for some of you, is why I'm experiencing so many problems lately. Maybe it's not. But either way, this is my attempt at detoxifying my life.

Yes, as I'm sure all of you who I haven't already told suspected, I'm gay.

Now, I really don't want to make a big deal out of this. Why? Because it's not really central to who I am as far as I'm concerned. There are so many more interesting things about me. Like did you know that I'm an ordained reverend and can legally perform weddings? Much more interesting than who I'm potentially attracted to.

So please, don't make a big deal out of this. I've known for a long time. I'm still the same person I was before. My love of Metric, Canada, HIV advocacy, meeting new people, doing nerdy things like reading theoretical physics books for fun, Gwen Stefani, drinking like a fish, being a general badass, posting articles about current events and science that no one reads, yoga, the 7 Deadly Sins Games, randomly giving out complements to people I barely know on Facebook, and so many more things that really make up who I am haven't changed. I'm still the same old Joey, with all my quirks and flaws and positive attributes and my tendency to care a little too much about other people. I'm just finally able to show who I am in my entirety.

This was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do partially because I've been scared of how people will react and partially because I'm not really friends with any guys, let alone gay ones, so I don't know what others have gone through. That's why I really appreciate any support you can give me.





I can assure you all of one thing:

No more lies.

2011 Resolutions

I've decided that rather than coming up with any specific resolutions for 2011, I'm just going to resolve to take better care of my health. We only have one chance and one body and I want to take care of mine. I'm going to start by continuing my switch to using all natural and/or organic bath products. I'm going to continue this by also trying to eat more organic and natural foods when possible. I need to get back in the habit of exercising as well. I saw this every year but I'd really like to get in decent shape. I did a good job of regularly exercising most of last year but I've severely slacked. Time to pick that up.

I hope everyone has a happy and healthy new year. It's going to be a good one!

The Best of 2010

Last year, for the first time, I made my list of the top 10 albums of the year and it was a really great way for me to reflect on all the great music that came out that year. I decided that this year I'm going to try something different and see which I like better... Instead of doing a list of albums, I'm going to pick a best album, best song, best live act, best new artist, and best flashback album (an album that came out a previous year but I didn't discover until this year). I figure this way I get to mix things up a bit and talk about a variety of different works that deserve credit for their awesomeness. I'm also going to include a short section on what I look forward to most in 2011. So, without further adieu, here's my picks for the best of 2010!

Album of the Year
This year had a lot of strong releases from some of my old favorites including Broken Social Scene, Stars, and Motion City Soundtrack as well some newly discovered artists like Basia Bulat and Woodpigeon. My pick for album of the year is (surprisingly) not from any of these artists, however. It's from an artist that I've listened to in the past and enjoyed but was blown away by the work they put out this year, Land of Talk.

Their release, Cloak and Cipher, is haunting and beautiful and a rocking good time all packaged into one album. Lizzie's distinct vocals are what really carry the album. Her voice is soft but doesn't get too breathy or weak like some female singers' voices can. Also, it's what her voice actually sounds like; I saw them live in September and there's no editing needed to create her unique sound (unlike many artists these days, it seems). If you're going to download just one song, make it Quarry Hymns. It's a truly beautiful song.

Song of the Year
This one gave me more trouble than picking album of the year. I toyed back and forth with a bunch of ideas. For a while I was going to choose "Sentimental X's" by BSS or "Changes" by Stars. "To Die For" by Tonight Alive was a strong contender and, more recently, "Sprawl II (Mountains Beyond Mountains)" by Arcade Fire was almost going to be chosen. While these songs are great and I strongly recommend all of them, there was one song that blew them all away...

"Black Sheep" by Metric. Yes, this song has existed in some form or another or other for a while but it was this year that the final studio version was released on the soundtrack for Scott Pilgrim vs. the World and let me just say, this song is SICK. It starts out with a lot of sexy, "Awww, yeahs!" and brings on the rock. The real great thing about this song is the guitar solo during the outro. I've always known that Jimmy Shaw was a great guitarist but this solidified his status as a guitar god. Seriously, give it a listen. If you're not mindfucked there's something wrong.

Best Live Act
I go to a lot of shows and 2010 was no exception. This year, I got to see Motion City Soundtrack (twice!), Meg & Dia, Metric, Broken Social Scene, Stars, Land of Talk, and many more artists that I love. They were all fantastic show but none of them compared to the two hour dance-mindfuck-empowerment-sing-along fest that was the Monster Ball put on by Lady Gaga.

This lady proved she's not just another pop star and truly put on a SHOW. As mentioned before, it was almost two hours long. Usually, having a short attention span and all, I'd get bored but Gaga kept it coming and even as she closed with "Bad Romance" I was left wanting more and even considering going to see her again the next night (which didn't happen for monetary reasons). Tickets to see her are expensive but she makes it worth every penny and then some with lights and dancers and a fountain of blood. Probably my favorite moment of the concert was when she was doing Speechless on the flaming piano. How cool is that?!


Best New Artist
I've said this for every category but again, this one was a toughie. There were a lot of great new artists this year but probably my favorite was Tonight Alive.

They're a really awesome band from Australia and have a nice, clean alternative rock sound. They get compared to compared to Paramore a lot and I guess I see the comparison to some extent but Jenna doesn't have the same snarl that Hayley does and I honestly think that the comparison is just made because both bands have female fronts (an unfair comparison if you ask me; just because two bands have female fronts does NOT mean they sound the same). They released their first album, All Shapes and Disguises, in June and it features a cover of "In My Eyes" by Rufio that I actually prefer to the original (which is not a common occurrence for me- I generally don't like covers). I'm definitely looking forward to seeing what this band has in store for us in the future!


Blast From the Past Album
I don't know how I didn't hear about this band earlier but early in 2010 I discovered the Rural Alberta Advantage and their 2008 release, Hometimes. This album is fantastic and one of the rare albums that I actually like all the songs on it. If you want a sample of it, download "Drain the Blood" or "Edmonton."

2011 Excitement
I'm not even gonna lie: 2011 is going to be a great musical year. No Doubt will (more than likely) be coming out with a new album and I have been waiting for this album FOREVER. In addition, the Sounds are apparently done with their new album that should be released sometime this year and the Ting Tings are releasing a new album as well. Metric is headed back to the studio so maybe we'll be getting a new album from them as well. Lady Gaga's new album is due out beginning of the year and I've heard rumors that she'll be releasing her new single soon. Of course, there will also be a ton of other releases that I haven't heard about yet... 2011 should be an exciting year in music!

Blogging Fail

With the Christmas rush behind us, that means we can officially turn our attention to the impending new year and it's made me realize something: I have failed hardcore at blogging this year, especially the last few months. I did that awesome blog challenge in August but past that, diddly squat. If I did write something, it was me being sentimental and reflecting on the past or contemplating some big philosophical issue. Well, I assure you that next year I'll take more time to actually blog about things that people WANT to read about... and with greater frequency. I'll be writing a blog sharing my New Years resolutions soon but for now, it's time to recover and relax after the craziness of the past few days... All that family time takes a lot out of you! I hope everyone had a fantastic Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate this time of year) and is looking forward to many good things in the coming year!

Grammy Picks 2011!

The Grammy nominations were announced for the 53rd Annual Grammy Awards last and, like always, I largely don't care about most of them. However, I do make a point to try to pick for most of the major categories even if I'm not all that into whoever it is. Here are my initial picks for the upcoming award show:

Record of the Year
Empire State of Mind- Jay-Z is one of the few rappers I like and I love Alicia Keys. My second pick would probably be the Bruno Mars song... or Fuck You haha.

Album of the Year
The Fame Monster- I... love Lady Gaga. And I love this album, more than The Fame in fact. I'd REALLY like to see Arcade Fire take it but I honestly don't see that happening... but how awesome would that be?

Song of the Year
Fuck You- This song makes me giggle. I also like Need You Now and think it's extremely well written and pleasant, especially for a country song.

Best New Artist
Justi... No, totally kidding. =) Florence and the Machine. I haven't listened to her much BUT what I have listened to I have enjoyed AND, unlike Beaver, she actually sings live. I'd be okay with Drake too. Mainly, I don't want J. Beaver winning. Not singing live is an unforgivable musical sin as far as I'm concerned.

Best Female Pop Vocal
One category that got everything right as far as I'm concerned. I actually really like all of these songs/artists. My pick would be Gaga and I def think her or Beyonce are the best vocalists but I'll be happy for whoever gets it.

Best Male Pop Vocal
Ehhhh... Haven't really listened to any of these so I don't care.

Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group
The Only Exception. Loves me some Paramore!


Best Pop Collaboration
This one is a tough one for me. I really like Telephone and Airplanes like a LOT. I guess I prefer Telephone (and it didn't get overplayed like Airplanes did).


Best Pop Vocal Album
The Fame Monster. Susan Boyle or Katy Perry are okay with me. Beaver, on the other hand, is not. Not at all.


Best Dance Recording
Dance In the Dark. I also like Rocket and In For the Kill. Rhianna... not so much.

Best Soundtrack for Movie, TV, etc.
Twilight... ONLY because Metric is part of this nom and they totally deserve a trillion Grammy's haha.

So many questions, where are the answers?

For a while now, I've considered myself an atheist. However, recently I think I've started to realize that we really don't know that much about the universe. A lot of people claim to know (or at least carry on like they have all the answers) but really, no one knows for sure... Not the pope, not Richard Dawkins, no one. This greatly disturbs me. Is it so much to ask to just KNOW? Why are we here? Where do we go? Is there any deeper meaning? I honestly don't think these questions will ever be answered.

I guess I'm back to being agnostic.

All Hallow's Eve

For those of you haven't had the joy of living with me (or at least spending an extended amount of time with me), you probably aren't aware of how seriously I take holidays. I love decorating for the season and watching cheesey specials that every TV show seems to have for every holiday. My obsession extends so much that I even get pretty into holidays such as Easter (despite not being Christian), 4th of July, and Singles Awareness Day (my sort of pseudo-anti Valentines Day substitute). My favorite holiday, however, is Halloween. I LOVE Halloween. Maybe it's because I can turn off my inner skeptic for a while and pretend that ghost stories are real or maybe it's all the freaking sugar (or maybe it's that I can use it as an excuse to watch Sabrina the Teenage Witch...), something about Halloween tickles my fancy like no other holiday does.

It seems as I've grown older, my Halloween celebrations have changed... or at least the last three years they've changed. Until I was 17, I would go trick-or-treating around my entire neighborhood... and my dad came with until I was probably 15. When I was 18, I did an abridged version of trick-or-treating, mainly to show off my Sarah Palin costume. Last year, despite having an epic Pikachu costume, I just walked around West Lafayette. This year I carved a pumpkin, watched the first 12 Simpsons Treehouse of Horror episodes, watched 5 of the Sabrina Halloween specials (not that I own them on DVD or anything... Haha), and will soon be going out to go dancing. Yes, I realize it's a Sunday and I'm in college but let's be honest: I need a day off. Like completely off. And that's exactly what I did. Despite being an adult, I think I'll always be pretty child-like when it comes to Halloween and I hope that someday I can help make Halloween a magical experience for my kids kind of like my dad did for me. Also, it means I'll get to tag along with my kids trick or treating... something I sorely miss.

While this Halloween season has been a bit busy and different than most (I'm living in an apartment and not at home) and I haven't been able to celebrate as much as I'd like to, it still was a great season as always. I really look forward to next October rolling around. Hopefully I'll have time for lots of spooky stories, going on a ghost tour, and other activities that make this time of year so great.