The Joeys: Best of 2011

Ahhh it's that time of year again where year end lists are almost impossible to avoid if you use the internet (which you obviously do if you're reading this). While I find many of the lists that seem to pop up are rather idiotic ("The 10 STIs contracted by Snooki in 2011!"), I do enjoy a lot of the current events ones and I especially enjoy the music ones which is why I try to make an effort to make my own personal list of the best of the year. That and everyone REALLY, REALLY cares what I think.

Anyway, I will shut up now and just get to the goddamn list. I now present to you Joey Lusvardi's picks for the best music of 2011!

LIVE ACT OF THE YEAR

This year, I had the privilege of going to not one but TWO music festivals, SXSW in March and Lollapalooza in August. Obviously, I saw a LOT of bands at these two festivals which made picking my favorite that much more difficult. I went back and forth between a few but ultimately decided that the best band I saw this year was...

THE SOUNDS

I didn't find out the Sounds were going to be at SXSW until just before I left and let me tell you, I flipped a shit. The night we arrived, they were playing at a party hosted by a music blog and the crafty little Soundsie that I am managed to get in in time to catch them. I was pretty far back but still danced until sweat from myself and various strangers was dripping down my entire body. The next day, I happened to run into them on the street. I was pretty damn awkward but managed to get a hug and a picture of myself with Maja!

And, if that wasn't enough, the day before we left I SAW THEM AGAIN. Yep, they were so good I saw them TWICE in three days. There's just something about Maja and her sexy dancing, her awkward Swedish accent, and that she'll randomly throw swears out that's so appealing. Oh, that and Felix is kind of sexy. Don't get me wrong, there definitely artists I saw that were better musically and others that had more energy or had something really unique to offer but there's just something about the Sounds that no other artist can quite capture.

Honorable mentions:
Lykke Li: Another Swede who I saw twice and puts on a killer performance. I had my doubts about her but when I saw her at Lollapalooza, it was an instant "WOW."

Ellie Goulding: Speaking of instant wows at Lollapalooza, ELLIE GOULDING. I am OBSESSED with this woman. She's a talented musician and that carries over live. She even keeps her cool when unexpected things happen such as a fan dancing her way on stage and going for a boob grab.


The Joy Formidable: Another Lolla act. They are insane. The trio are all incredibly with the lead singer and guitarist, Ritzy, shredding like some sort of rock goddess on her guitar... which she then proceeded to bang repeatedly into a gong during their final song. And they had giant inflatable cats. What's not to love?!

The Head and the Heart: My big discovery at SXSW, these guys (and gal) create such such incredible harmonies that will either make you happy or drink a whole whiskey river to drown your sorrows. My adviser from work and I saw them on a whim and a recommendation from a friend (Thanks, Merrijoy!) and two songs in were ready to bring them to my school's campus.

BEST NEW ARTIST

Every year I discover countless new artists because I'm a whore... A music whore, that is. Some of them are awful and I hope they fall off the face of the earth and I never hear their noise again (Ke$hit, for example). Others remind me that there is hope for the future of music. The following artist exemplifies the latter.

ELLIE GOULDING

For those of you who follow me on Twitter, are friends with me on Facebook, talk to me, or spend a significant amount of time eavesdropping on me, you know that I'm obsessed with this woman. Obsessed probably is a strong enough word, to be honest. She is glorious in every way. First off, look at her. The woman is sexy as hell. You can't see her body in this picture but she runs five miles a day even when she's on tour so she's not just a pretty face. On a more musically relevant note, she is incredibly talented as well. She makes pop music but it doesn't sound like anything you'll hear from anyone else. Unlike so many pop musicians these days, she also plays a variety of instruments. And to top it off, she's great live. She was invited to play the royal wedding, the Nobel Peace Prize concert, AND the national Christmas tree lighting ceremony this past year. Oh and her cover of Elton John's "Your Song" topped the charts in the UK. Pretty impressive for someone who hasn't been around too long, right?

Honorable mentions:

The Naked and Famous: These guys are pretty great, too. They remind me a little of the New Pornographers but, in my opinion, better. They have a nice electronic/alternative sound and have both male and female vocalists which I find quite enjoyable in a band.

The Joy Formidable: I already sang their praises in the last honorable mentions but they really deserve it again. Their whole album, The Big Roar, is a fantastic female-fronted-but-still-has-more-balls-than-most-of-the-men-I-know rock powerhouse.

The Head and the Heart: These guys are fantastic live, fantastic musically, and fantastic people (They were all really nice when I met them).

SONG OF THE YEAR

This one and album of the year are by far the most important of all of my musical picks. One song that defines an entire year? Shit, that's a pretty hefty decision to make! And with so many great songs and strong releases by a huge variety of artists, there was a huge pool to pick from.

"WHIRRING" BY THE JOY FORMIDABLE

Awwww, look at how cute Ritzy, the lead singer of the Joy Formidable, is!! She's just an adorable English woman, probably a nurse or a teacher or something non-threatening, right? WRONG. You are so fucking wrong.

See how wrong you were?

Ritzy is the definition of badass. Simply being in her mere presence is like some sort of rock-and-roll religious experience. Her badass nature is especially apparent in"Whirring," a six minute rock opera, for lack of better words to describe this masterpiece. Remember earlier when I talked about her slamming her guitar into a gong during the final song of their Lolla set? Yeah, this was that song. Any song that evokes guitar slamming is a great song in my book. The song starts out with two minutes of Ritzy's vocals along with some great guitar playing but it gets REALLY great for the last portion when the singing stops and the song becomes one giant guitar solo. And I'm not talking your grandmother's guitar solo, assuming your grandmother was/is into music that includes a guitar solo. It's more like... Fuck it, just go listen to the song. Even if you've heard it before, go listen again. You'll see what I mean.

Honorable mentions:

"The No No Song" by the Sounds: For those who remember my halfway through 2011 best of list, this song was my pick for the best song so far (I hadn't heard "Whirring" at that point). It has everything I love in a song: Angry female vocals, synths, guitars, and sexy, sexy Swedes.

"Polish Girl" by Neon Indian: A friend sent this song to me a few months back and I've been listening to it non-stop ever since. It's got a really cool electronic beat and their lead singer's voice is like silk. If I could sex his voice, I would.

"Toes" by Lights: I love Lights. She's cute, has tattoos, and plays Zelda. Oh, and she's got a great voice and makes awesome indie pop music. This song was the first one I heard from her new album, Siberia, and it still is my favorite. It's a really cute crush song that very accurately describes the feeling of being interested in someone new.

ALBUM OF THE YEAR

What's harder to do than make one great song? Make 10+ of them and put them all on the same record. Like I've said, 2011 was a great year in music. So which artist made the best collection of songs from the past 365 days?

"THE HEAD AND THE HEART" BY THE HEAD AND THE HEART

You should've seen this coming by the number of times I've mentioned them already. This band is fucking incredible. How my ears lived without them remains a mystery. Their self-titled debut is one of those rare albums that I like every song on it. Every song. There's not one that I feel so-so about or think really sucks. THEY'RE ALL GREAT. There are upbeat songs ("Cats and Dogs," "Ghosts") and mellow, low key ones ("Rivers and Roads," "Winter Song") to fit any mood, any life situation, anything you feel like listening to. If this album isn't in your music collection and this band not on your radar, you're missing out on what I'm confident will be one of the greatest bands of our time.

Honorable mentions:

"Metals" by Feist: For those are familiar with Feist, you'll recognize her distinctive sound on this album. However, she still continues to grow and explore new sounds and improve (as if that's possible) on previous work.

"Ceremonials" by Florence + The Machine: Yep, Florence's sophomore album is pretty great. She makes me question whether or not the sophomore slump is real. Give "Spectrum" a listen.

"Wounded Rhymes" by Lykke Li: Another indie pop gem. This album got Lykke a lot of well deserved press this year and it translates well live. Songs range from upbeat ("Get Some") to romantic ("I Know Places") to absolutely heart wrenching ("Unrequited Love").

"Departing" by the Rural Alberta Advantage: Ahhh, Canadians... How I love thee and your music. I saw these guys twice this year, too, and they were great. "Departing" is just as good as their first album. Nils' voice is very distinctive and unique and Amy and Paul are both great musicians.

"Catching a Tiger" by Lissie: I love Lissie and this album is fantastic. It's very rock filled and Lissie is a really kickass chick. She seems really cool, too.

MOST ANTICIPATED ALBUM OF 2012

2012 is already looking to be a great year for music and it hasn't even begun yet. So great, in fact, that I couldn't pick just one most anticipated album and need to pick two. Oh, that and my two favorite bands have albums due out in 2012.

NO DOUBT AND METRIC

Oh lord, I've been waiting for a new No Doubt album for about as long as I can remember. AND IT'S FINALLY, FINALLY GOING TO HAPPEN THIS YEAR. The band says that they've made significant progress and... I can't wait. I'm literally going to wait outside of the store to buy this album the day it comes out. I'll probably buy like six copies actually.

Metric... How they can follow up after "Fantasies" remains a mystery. However, I remain confident that they will made another impossibly great album. Emily recently said that the album is due out in April which means I should probably start saving up for possible trips to see them at various festivals. Oh, and that means that there's hope for my dream of them touring with No Doubt, right?!

Thus concludes my list for the year. I'm sure there's tons of music I missed but I'm only one person. Here's to 2011 and to an excellent 2012!

#40ThingsAboutMe Part 4

It's the final installment of my riveting blog series full of facts about yours truly! I know, everyone's sad.

31. Watermelon is one of my favorite foods.

32. Celebrities/pseudo-celebrities/bands I have met: Hilary Clinton, Al Franken, Metric, Chelsea Handler, Kenny from the Starting Line, most of Motion City Soundtrack, Hal Sparks, the lead singer of Metro Station, 4 of the members of Broken Social Scene, Hot Hot Heat, OK Go, the Sounds, the Head and the Heart... and others I can't think of right now.

33. I used to have 3000+ origami cranes hanging from my bedroom ceiling but they kept falling and it was too much work to keep up with rehanging them.

34. I find it incredibly annoying when people are like, "ZOMG, MY HOROSCOPE TOTALLY DESCRIBED MY DAY!!!" They're written so generically that they can apply to anyone. It's sad that people put such stock in a pseudo-science.

35. I eat a lot of spinach.

36. It really annoys me when people say things like, "I'm praying that someone goes and picks up my drunk friend so he doesn't have to drive!" Ummmmm... how about instead of relying on your invisible friend you go do it yourself if you're so concerned? Don't use religion as a crutch for laziness.

37. When I was younger, a friend tried to convince me she had diabetes. I believed her for a while until I saw her eat an entire bag of Skittles and she tried to convince me it was because she had "light switch diabetes" that could be turned on or off. Now I'm suspicious of people who tell me they have diabetes until they show me proof.

38. When I'm cooking, I tend to skip measuring things and just kind of approximate. It's less stressful and once you've been cooking enough it generally turns out alright.

39. Speaking of cooking, I can't make the following seemingly simple foods: cookies, pancakes, any sort of roux.

40. I really hate the name Jesse (for guys). I don't think I could ever date a guy with that name.

#40ThingsAboutMe Part 3

21. I have four tattoos and each one of them has special meaning to me.

22. I LOVE discovering new bands. Recently (read: yesterday) I discovered the Joy Formidable and I don't really understand how they managed to slip under my radar for so long. They're a hard rocking female fronted band. That's like a description of the music I like.

23. When I was in 4th grade, I read a scary story in a book of scary stories about a kid that poured vinegar down an anthill and the next day, he saw an anthill that spelled the word "HATE." Later that night, he woke up and was covered in ants. You can figure out what happened next. Even to this day and even though I'm generally more rational than that, I still get a slight rush of fear each time I step on an ant because I'm scared they will get me.

24. One of my lifetime goals is to live in a house with a secret passage.

25. In high school, my friend Molly and I used to play this game where we'd have someone name something random and we'd try to turn whatever they said into something dirty in less than 5 sentences. It got to the point where we'd be able to do it consistently in 2.

26. I can't watch other people go on Facebook because their Facebooking styles will drive me insane. I can't stand leaving friend requests, event invites, and notifications unresponded to.

27. I have a weird obsession with Canada... even though I've never been there. A lot of it has to do with the music that I listen to because a significant portion of my music is by Canadian artists. Also, everyone I've met from Canada with very few exceptions has been super fun, outgoing, warm, and friendly. I wish I could say that of more Americans.

28. I get really annoyed when I ask someone what kind of music they like and they respond with, "Everything!" or "Whatever's on the radio." First of all, no, you don't like all music. Everyone has music they don't like. Second, the reason most people ask what kind of music you like is to see if you have anything in common and responding with just "everything" gets you nowhere. Third, and this really only applies to the last one, but I find it really frustrating when people just listen to what they're told to listen to. There are a lot of great bands out there that you'll probably like that don't get mainstream radio exposure. Go discover what YOU actually like. If that happens to be on the radio, great. But if you're too lazy to actually discover what you like to listen to... we probably won't get along.

29. I wish I had gotten into snowboarding at a younger age. I'm still pretty awful and I feel like I've been doing it for long enough that I should be much better than I am.

30. I become attached to things too easily and it causes me a lot of angst.

#40ThingsAboutMe Part 2

I'm supposed to be studying for my organic chemistry test on Thursday... but obviously I'm going to procrastinate by blogging. Here's part 2 of my 40 facts thing!

11. Even though I'm really inflexible, yoga is probably my favorite form of exercise. It burns a lot of calories and builds strength at the same time. One of the things I'm most proud of is going from barely being able to do bridge pose to being able to get into a full wheel.

12. I usually don't crave potato chips or sugary foods like most people do. Instead, I'll randomly crave foods such as (but not limited to) watermelon, strawberries, lentils, peanut butter, spinach, corn, and carrots.

13. The quickest way to piss me off is to not return a text, call, etc. or to just blatantly ignore me. I'd rather you had the respect (if you can call it that) to lie to me about having plans if you don't want to do something than just not respond.

14. I HATE talking on the phone. Please, for the love of Shiva, text me instead of calling me.

15. No Doubt and Metric have had an indescribable impact on my life. I've met so many amazing people because of them and have had incredible experiences because of both of them. Their impact on my life has been absolutely one of the most positive things to ever happen. People often wonder why I'm so passionate about them (and I often get made fun of for this passion) and THIS IS WHY. It goes beyond the music. It's the community and the bonds with people that make them so special.

16. When I was younger, I used to think that I would never end up drinking. Well... things have changed haha.

17. My oldest brother is becoming a Catholic priest. Needless to say, our worldviews are in extreme conflict.

18. Smoking=Instant turn off.

19. I really like gardening. Not so much the actual process of digging in the dirt and what not, but I like seeing the results.

20. I've never kissed someone I'm legitimately attracted to. I've either been drunk or just gone along with it because I liked that I was getting attention from a guy.

#40ThingsAboutMe Part 1

One of the trending topics on Twitter right now is #40ThingsAboutMe. Twitter limits your posts to 140 characters, however, so it's pretty much impossible to fit 40 facts into a single tweet and tweeting 40 times in a row makes you a real asshole so I've decided to share my 40 facts in blog form. This provides the double benefit of allowing everyone to come back and read it whenever they want. So go ahead, memorize away!

Actually, please don't memorize because that's a little creepy.

Also, due to laziness and lack of ideas for blogs, I'm going to break this into four parts. So here are 10 facts for now. Read and enjoy.

1. I have an irrational fear of getting diabetes. When I was younger, I used to be terrified of sugar because I was completely convinced it would make me diabetic. Obviously I still ate it, I just at it in terror.

2. One time I sang backing vocals on stage with a small group of other people for Jenny Lewis.

3. The band I've seen live the most times is Motion City Soundtrack, followed by Paramore.

4. I have a lot of social anxiety. I have a hard time starting a conversation with someone I don't know well.

5. I'm especially bad at talking to guys, even if I'm not interested in them in a romantic way. I will, without failure, read into everything as a sign that they hate me.

6. If I am interested in you, I show it in weird ways and I become highly terrified of you. More than anything, I probably will become really awkward and subdued when I talk to you.

7. Mushrooms are the bane of my existence. How anyone can actually enjoy them is beyond me.

8. Online shopping will be my downfall. There's something really exciting about clicking purchase and then the anticipation of it coming in the mail... Ohhhhhh yeah!

9. I LOVE science and I share a lot of articles about it on my various social networking accounts. I feel like it annoys a lot of people but I really don't care. Science rules, man.

10. I take lots of naps. Not just 20 minute naps but more like 3 hour naps. If it were for the need to eat, exercise, and go to the bathroom, I'd probably sleep all day.

CARDIO, Y U NO BE MORE EXCITING?!

As I so often seem to start sentences in here, I'm going to start another one with "For those of you who..."

For those of you who don't pay attention, know me at all, or are just mildly mentally challenged, I enjoy fitness and exercising. And by enjoy it, I mean I force myself to do it in the hopes of some day attracting a male... even Jillian Michaels has admitted that she doesn't like to work out (or at least that's what an ad on a website told me). My point is that I'm really into fitness. However, lately I've been really lacking the motivation to do most of my cardio workouts. I don't want to run. Running is so... bleh and repetitive.

So, like any person who lacks a social life off the internet, I'm turning to you, my wonderful blog readers and Twitter randos and randos from Germany (seriously, I keep getting random views on here from Germany) for some advice. What the fuck do I do for cardio that's less dull? Keep in mind that I'm cheap and fairly poor so I don't want to go shoveling out a ton of money for new equipment unless it's gonna get me really ripped.

I'm also open to new forms of non-cardio exercise as well (know a great yoga place that's cheap? LET ME KNOW). Doing the same things over and over gets old fast.

You can call me Dr. Phil

 "Only hang out with people you like. I learned this and it changed my life."

-Emily Haines

Most people think of summer as a time to relax and unwind but, I, on the other hand, seem to always have this crazy notion that I should take summer classes. Needless to say, this makes my summer significantly less exciting especially when the class I'm taking this summer is O chem II. I'm gonna keep it real, it's not really going the greatest. It's not that I'm not trying or anything but I just don't get it.  Every time I'm asked, "How would you perform this synthesis?" I feel like, rather than attempting to bullshit my way through a synthesis, I'd be better off just writing, "I would ask someone who actually understands chemistry to do it."

Last night I actually emerged from my study shell (and by emerged from my study shell, I mean last night was one of the three nights a year when someone was like, "Gee, Joey still exists. Maybe we should call him!") for a while. We were in some rando's backyard and somehow the subject of prom came up. One of my friends mentioned that she didn't enjoy her prom because she didn't really want to spend time with her boyfriend and would have rather gone with her friends.

For some reason, this statement jarred me. I'm no relationship expert, largely because I have yet to find someone who's desperate enough to date me, but I feel like my almost complete degree in psychology and the fact that I passed social psych brings me pretty damn close, right? I've always been of the school of thought that you really shouldn't be dating someone that you don't want to spend time with because you can only have sex for so many hours in a day (and even then, sex as a foundation for a relationship generally doesn't lead to anything stable) and you'll be spending plenty of time with each other so shouldn't you actually look forward to that time?

Apparently, not everyone thinks this way because I know WAY too many people aren't dating someone who they genuinely like outside of the bedroom. I've always said that I don't want to rush into a relationship with someone because I want to have the foundation of a genuine friendship but it seems like too many many people are waaaay to eager to get right into a relationship or each others' pants.

Now, I may be biased in this last statement because of the types of guys I tend to attract. For some reason, the stage 5 clingers are really into me. I don't really know why this is because I have a tendency to make my annoyance very clear but they persist. Maybe I have a musk that tells guys that I like being texted, "Hey, what's up? How are you? What are you thinking? What are you feeling?" three times a day or maybe it's what I get for trying to be nice to most people. Either way, I have a low threshold for that and I quickly lose any mild interest I may have had before.

My point is that people need to SLOW THE FUCK DOWN and take time to get to know each other. Studies have shown that couples who are friends tend to last longer and quite honestly, you didn't need to do an empirical study to tell me that. It seems kind of... duh? The reasoning behind this may be because there are two different kinds of love that play a key role in intimate relationships. The first kind is passionate love, and, as the name suggests, this is the "OMG I WANT TO HUMP YOUR BRAINS OUT!!!!" kind of love. I don't remember the exact length of time but it doesn't exactly last a long period. Like your passion, your relationship will probably fizzle unless there's a strong foundation of companionate love. This is the kind of love where you genuinely care about the other person and what they think, feel, etc. This is the kind of love found in deep friendships and generally lasts a lot longer than passionate love (and actually grows over time). Without it, your relationship will not work for an extended period and I've never seen the point of getting into a relationship I knew would fail.

To sum things up, if you find someone that you're interested in dating, take the time to actually get to know them. You'll be glad you did because in the long run your relationship will be stronger. If things don't work out between you and them, hey, that's okay. Some people don't work out together. You'll probably find someone else and if you don't, there's always cats!